The Fabulosity of His Presence

My trainer Steve and I have a special relationship. I share ethical observations with him and he shares his considerable wisdom with me. I stopped during a session once to point out: “It’s not just what you say, Steve, it’s how supremely confident you are when you say it.”

He nonchalantly smiled through his sunglasses, “That’s because you are in the presence of my fabulosity.”

For Steve, it’s a priceless piece of self-mockery. For Texas Senator Ted Cruz, however, it’s a characteristic that is merely self-evident.

I’d never heard of this variation of fabulous until Steve first mentioned it, so, I looked it up in the best colloquial source I know, the Urban Dictionary:

Fabulosity is about being the best at everything, looking fabulously sexy, having the best things, flaunting your fabulousness, and loving yourself and/or other fabulous people around you.”

And here’s the kicker: “Only a select few out of the whole human population are fabulous enough to live in ‘fabulosity’.”

Much of the Cruz fabulosity was in full force last Friday. TheNew York Times writes (June 7), that the Texas senator “electrified delegates by assailing the ‘great stagnation’ and ‘crushing regulations’ of the Obama administration, calling on Texans to ‘stand up and lead the fight to defend our freedom.’ He ignited laughter and applause by asserting that gun control in Texas means ‘hitting what you aim at.’ ”

After 29 school shootings from January 1 to May 23, 2014, “Hitting what you aim at” is Cruz’s idea of a joke.

“To no one’s surprise, Mr. Cruz was a star-spangled celebrity at the three-day Texas Republican Convention, hailed as the biggest state political convention in the nation, which drew more than 7,000 delegates, alternates and guests and ended Saturday.

“In a straw poll of potential 2016 presidential candidates, Mr. Cruz was the overwhelming favorite of delegates, with 43.4 percent of the vote.”

“He tells you what he’s going to do, and he does it,” John Justice, a contractor from near Houston, said of Mr. Cruz. “He’s not like all the other weasels up there.”

Ted Cruz is, indeed, special. Walk with me down the memory lane of just some of the junior senator’s most inspiring, actionable words from his 21-hour Senate talk-a-thon:

– “I will stay standing here after 14 hours. Standing on your feet, there’s sometimes some pain, sometimes some fatigue that is involved. But you know what? There’s far more pain involved in rolling over … far more pain in hiding in the shadows, far more pain in not standing for principle, not standing for the good, not standing for integrity.”

– “I will credit my father, he invented … green eggs and ham. He did it two ways. The easy way was he would put green food coloring in … But if you take spinach and mix it into the eggs, the eggs turn green … I do not like green eggs and ham. I do not like them, Sam I am.”

– Quoting the TV show Duck Dynasty: “Jeff said ‘Faith, family and facial hair.’ I point out to the junior senator from Utah, if we continue doing this long enough, we may have facial hair on the floor of the Senate.”

– “The moon might be as intimidating as Obamacare.”

– “I like their little burgers … I’m a big fan of eating White Castle burgers.”

– “I don’t think there’s been a day on this floor that I haven’t worn my argument boots … I am not in my argument boots and I will confess, I really do feel embarrassed by that.”

– “This fight is not about personalities. Look, most Americans could not give a flying flip about a bunch of politicians in Washington. Who cares? … You know, almost all of us are in cheap suits with bad haircuts. Who cares?”

– Comparing Obamacare to the Nazis: “Look, we saw in Britain, Neville Chamberlain, who told the British people, ‘Accept the Nazis. Yes, they’ll dominate the continent of Europe but that’s not our problem. Let’s appease them. Why? Because it can’t be done. We can’t possibly stand against them.’ ”

As a Tea Party Republican, Cruz staunchly defended his support of the 2013 government shutdown over Obamacare: “The sort of cocktail chatter wisdom in Washington that, ‘Oh, the shutdown was a political disaster for Republicans,’ is not borne out by the data,” he added.

According to a September 2013 Gallup survey, “U.S. support for the Tea Party is at a low ebb” at 22 percent of likely voters.

But if you think the Tea Party is over, tell that to seven-term, former House Majority Leader Eric Cantor who, despite spending more than $5 million on a primary campaign, lost to Tea Party nobody, now somebody, David Brat who spent less than $123K and calls his victory, “…a miracle from God.”

Tea Party Republicans like Brat and Cruz aren’t interested in making deals with the other side. They don’t believe in reason. They don’t recognize common ground, and don’t even think about whispering the “C” word (compromise). Along with lower taxes, the Tea Party adamantly insists on extremely small government, (except, of course, in case of floods, hurricanes, tornadoes, and farm subsidies).

“What they do want is not nearly as clear as what they’re against,” CBS News correspondent Bob Schieffer points out, “and they’re basically against everybody in the establishment in elected office right now.”

For Ted Cruz any new Tea Party colleague in Congress can only reflect well on his growing fabulosity. Quoting actor Ashton Kutcher, Cruz said, ” ‘Always be sexy.’ I salute that message.”

0 comments… add one

Leave a Comment