Photo: AP. The majority of the text was created by artificial intelligence

…and spot Donald Trump holding court. Curious, they approach and begin a conversation.

Socrates: Tell me, sir, what is the nature of leadership? Is it to serve the people or to serve oneself?

Trump: Great question. I get a lot of great questions. And let me tell you, nobody knows leadership better than me. People love me. I’ve been very successful. Very strong. And winning is what matters.

Marcus Aurelius: True strength lies in self-mastery. A leader must govern himself before he governs others.

Trump: Self-mastery? Look, I’ve mastered everything. Business, media, politics. I won. And when you win, people follow. That’s leadership.

Socrates: But is a leader truly great if he does not seek wisdom? If he surrounds himself only with those who flatter him and avoids the hard questions, does he not risk leading the people astray?

Trump: Fake news. I ask the best questions, the smartest questions. And I don’t need two guys in robes telling me what to do. Look at the economy, the polls—when I was in charge, things were great. People respect strength, not sitting around debating.

Marcus Aurelius: A wise ruler is not measured by wealth or popularity but by his virtue. To govern without self-discipline is to be ruled by one’s own desires. The world is fleeting; what matters is how we act in service to others.

Trump: Look, I’ve done more for the people than anybody. I’ve made America great, and now that I’m back, I’m going to make it greater—annexing Canada, buying Greenland, taking control of the Panama Canal, and I’ll turn the Gaza strip into a multi-billion dollar playground. Nobody wants weak leadership. People want power. They want someone who fights. I fight. That’s why they love me. I don’t have time for all this thinking. Thinking is fine, but action is better. People want results, not questions.

Both Greek masters sigh.

Trump: People like strong leaders, not philosophers. You guys talk a lot, but I get things done. And, by the way, nobody has better instincts than me. Ask anyone.

Socrates: But if a man believes he has nothing to learn, is he not the most ignorant of all?

Trump: Wrong. I have a very good brain. I use it all the time. And I trust my instincts. Instincts are better than books, believe me.

Marcus Aurelius: A man who refuses to reflect is like a ship sailing without a compass.

Socrates: Or a man building walls instead of bridges.

Trump: Strong walls. The best walls. You know, you guys should read my book, The Art of the Deal. Very smart. You’d love it.

Marcus Aurelius: I prefer Meditations. It teaches that power without virtue is hollow.

Socrates: And that the unexamined life is not worth living.

Trump (waving to the bartender): Not sure what you guys are drinking, but I’ll have another Diet Coke.